Timeline (Pretzel of Doom)

January

 * 13th: US President George W. Bush chokes on a pretzel while watching an NFL football game and dies of asphyxiation. Vice President Richard "Dick" Cheney is sworn in as the 44th President of the United States
 * 19th: The funeral for George W. Bush is held in Washington, D.C. He is eulogized by President Cheney, his father and former President George H. W. Bush, Texas Governor Rick Perry, and British Prime Minister Tony Blair.
 * 21st: A second funeral is held for the late President Bush at his ranch in Crawford, Texas, where he is buried. The ranch is announced to be renamed "the George W. Bush Presidential Memorial Ranch."
 * 29th: President Cheney delivers the State of the Union Address, the first since the September 11 attacks, and urges America to unite despite the tragic past six months, a pain now exacerbated by the sudden death of the President. "Let us heal instead of harry, and let us emerge from this nightmare stronger than before, more resolved than ever to combat our foes wherever they may find us to honor and cherish the legacy and memory of all those we have lost, both in New York, in Virginia, in Pennsylvania and now even in the White House." While praised for its eloquence, many on both sides of the political spectrum felt that Cheney's speech was far too combatative.

February

 * 3rd: In Superbowl XXXVI, St. Louis Rams safety Dexter McCleon intercepts a late Tom Brady pass to force the 17-17 game into overtime, and the Rams win on their first possession thanks to a Jeff Wilkins field goal to win 20-17 over a team they were favored to beat by 14-points in the only Super Bowl to ever go into overtime. President Bush was honored in pregame and halftime ceremonies and his father gave the pregame coin toss.

May

 * 3rd: Spiderman is released to the biggest opening box-office weekend gross in history and as the most successful comic book film of all time.

January

 * 19th: Pittsburgh advances to Super Bowl XXXVII by blasting No. 1 seed Oakland on the road, while Philadelphia hangs on to defeat Tampa Bay at home in a wild, high-scoring affair.
 * 26th: The Pittsburgh Steelers, led by Kordell