Funnier History (Map Game)

What if history was funny?

What if all major events since the year 1800 turned out to be quite entertaining?

Well here we find out.

Rules

 * 1) I'm writing a page based on this so if you help a bit there that would be very much appreciated
 * 2) Whatever you post must be both funny and realistic if it's not it's getting deleted (sorry)
 * 3) It goes from the 1st of January 1800 and continues right up until whatever the hell date your reading this.
 * 4) Everything must have a precise date
 * 5) Don't colonize space
 * 6) Try and write some sort of live feed if it gets to the present day

1800
February - A strange cold resistant strain of marijuana gets into Canada and spreads like a weed (pardon the pun), the Canadian population quickly capitalizes on their new found "weed", they quickly pass into law the "Cannabis Act 1800" which bans all tax on marijuana in the country.



May - Napoleons soldiers decide it would be quite entertaining to kick Napoleon off his horse while crossing the Alps. Napoleon is dead.

April/October - Alexander Hamilton is elected president through Benjamin Franklin putting his name on the ballot as a joke.

November - People though it would be funny to be anarchist and burn down all of London.

1801
January - Luxembourg sends soldiers to conquer all of Belgium, the Netherlands, France, and Prussia, as well as their overseas Empires. Luxembourg is now the most powerful nation on earth.

February - The exiled king of Prussia pimp-slaps the entire population of Luxembourg. They hand back his territory.

Stalin comes back in time with half of the NKVD and declares control of the USA.

March- Stalin sells the Luxembourgish army PPSH-41s.

November- An anarchist revolution takes over Spain.

December- Stalin decides to get a more american name, he is now Bobby Hamilton.

1802
January- Former president Alexander Hamilton declares Stalin a "poser", who is so ashamed by this he goes back to Soviet Russia along with the NKVD member's.

February- An interstellar trading consortium (the Johnson&Johnson Textiles Marketing Division) consisting of the Grays, Wookies, and the colors Indigo, Magenta, and Strawberry Blond stage a landing on Svalbard in order to capture samples of polar ice for use in a super-thin condom.

July- The Great Bovine Revolution of '02 begins in England and Vermont.

December- China is taken over by a man afflicted with dwarfism who is only 2 feet tall.

December-Jesus Christ appears in Luxembourg.

1803
January-The CEO of Johnson&Johnson, the Color Magenta is overthrown by Jesus Christ.

Some Random Thursday-Bavaria is invaded by Chuck Norris.

March-Bavaria is renamed Norristan with its Supreme Emperor Chuck Norris.

The Bovine Revolution ends with a new Country ,Bovistan, gaining Scotland, the Isle of Man, Vermont, Massachussetts, New Hamsphire, and Wales.

April-The Chinese make metal armored ships then invade Korea, Japan, and the Ngyuan dynasty and completly annexes them, all in 1 day.

August-Jesus Christ is proven to be an imposter he is then roundhouse kicked by Chuck Norris to Mars.

The Color Magenta is found murdered in Dundee, Scotland.

Barry Finklestein, a gray alien is the new CEO of Johnson&Johnson.

October-A mutant crab pirate dubbed Captain Crabcakes begins pirate raids around China.

December-The Luxembourgi Civil War starts.

1804
March-The Luxembourgi Civil War ends with East and West Luxembourg formed. Some German States are liberated.

The Alemmanic Empire is formed from Prussia and other liberated german states.

June-The Associated Neighborhoods of New York or A.N.o.N.Y. for short is proclaimed in New York City.

July-The United States develops a new musket that shoots musketballs with mad cow disease in them, they use these guns to take back Massachusetts.

October -Russia colonizes Alaska because, in the imortal words of Alexander II (how is in power through some means), "Because, we can....and now we did". All of Russia throw a year long party of maryment and joyfulness. They also somk some of the Canadian "weed" to see what all the hub-bub is about.......needless to say, canibise is now legal.

1805
Eddie the Pig with his universal control remote fast-forwards through 1805 so nothing happens.

1806
January-Mass suicide occurs because of the fast-forwarding.

Another Stalin from the future comes to prevent the origional from killing himself.

Eddie the pig is found, tried, and hung.

1807
After the slave trade act is introduced in the UK banning the slave trade from africa, the population of the UK decide that intead of using black africans they'll use short people intead. People under five foot in hieght are immeaditley rounded up.

1808
Ludwig van Beethoven dies halfway through his fifth symphony after the piano collapses on top of him.

1809
The state of Rhode Island seades from the union saying is was sick of the whiney ass President Thomas Jefferson.

1810
Napoleon in a fit of power maddness declares himself 'king of the world' King George III orders a large naked bottom painted on the white cliffs of Dover in reply.

Further more, Napoleon added to his previous declaration, becoming, "king of the world, on a boat like leo".

1811
Aliens land at Kew Gardens in London, King George III shoots them all thinking they are geese.

1812
Instead of declaring war on the British the US government accidentally declares war on King George III personnaly. King George III responds by sending a letter to congress telling them he didn't know they liked him so much and that they may kiss his amble royal backside.

1813
Jane Austin releses her book Pride and extreame predjudice about fighting at the royal court.

1814
The Pope decides that the Gregorian calender should be returned to the Julian calender, meaning that there are 12 15th's of Septmeber.

1815
The pope decides that the Julian calender is a stupid idea and returns to the Gregorian calender and the 10th to 22nd of July no longer exist this year.

5181
Somebody from a parallel dimension thought it would be funny to reverse everything. CD notgnihsaW becomes the capital of the aciremA fo setatS detinU.

1816
Order to the multiverse is restored. Washington DC is restored as the capital of the United States of America

The United Republic of Canuckistan is formed.

1817
England goes into civil war

Ireland gets its independence.

With Ireland's new found independence, the Irish technocracy introduces prohibition to stop civil unrest and established government police division to burn down Hops. Public outcry raged in Dublin and all major city as the Irish people wished to return to British rule and re-establish beer import with England.

1818
In the English civil war the sides have developed into two side the Tall peoples alliance and the Shorty's United.

Kerosene is discovered to be a refreshing drink and soon becomes the latest craze in French culinary as a sweetener. 23 out of 29 million French people are dead from kidney and liver failure.

Unstoppable French boning centuples the population, but because of their low genetic heritage they are all psycotic male albinos, French women are extinct.

Finland declares its independence and invades Sweden, Russia, Brazil, Prussia and China.

'''That's not really funny, its just ridiculous. Seriously, come on!'''

Canada purchased the United States since the U.S was in $2.6 trillion debt to the Canadians for buying Canadian marijuana. The Americans were easily convinced since they were still half baked when the deal was proposed. They are now AmeriCanadians.

1819
The new AmeriCanadians finally come out of the drug haze and realize they've been screwed by the Canadians, but the Canadians offer a huge amount of dope free and the possible rebellion is squashed

1820
Napolean Bonapart declares himself King of Scotland and in orders sent to Edinburgh he asks for a half mile deep half mile wide trench to be dug along the entire Scotland/England border, destroying the existing fort.

1821
Napolean dies in May of poisoning by Kerosene on St Helena, his favorite dog Boo-boo becomes the next King of Scotland.

Napoleon died like 20 years ago.

1822
The King of England slaps an AmeriCanadian. The AmeriCanadian apologizes for hurting the King's hand.

April 14 - Boo-boo orders his royal subjects to build a bridge between Ireland and Scotland, with fancy lightbulbs. Boo-boo buys Canada, which includes USA.

November 17- Boo-boo is overthrown by a revolution and replaced by Mr. Fluffy or Napoleon's cat.

November 18- Mr. Fluffy chokes to death. Polly Napoleon's parrot is coronated emperor.

Novemeber 19th- France is now annexed by Austria- Hungary after Polly is bribed with a cracker.

sometime- someone from the future kills the luxembourgi presidents and the governments become in exile.

December 5th- Italy invades the European parts of Luxembourg Not funny, though possible, so that's even worse.

1823
Chuck Norris travels back in time by rubbing his beard three times anticlockwise.

Godzilla challenges Chuck Norris and wins, Godzilla then walks away after pooping on the Eiffel tower and then fights a Dalek invasion. Davros pees his pants as a result.

1824
Chuck Norris regains his strength and decides to swim south and then tow Antartica north to the Equator to make a new holiday home for himself.

1825
Chuck Norris arrives at the Equator with Antartica and builds his holiday home with the help of penguins.

1826
With Antartica now at the Equator the ice melts and floods the world, refugees from around the world arrives on Chuck Norrisland.

1827
Chuck Norrisland becomes the most populus nation on earth.

1828
Godzilla and Al Gore team up to kill Chuck Norris, needless to say the world is restored and Chuck Norris is dead. Al GOre becomes "The Man"

1829
Zippy reveals his intention to legalize abortion, which Fireman Sam disapproves of.

1830
Bob The Builder & Handy Manny have a huge fight over who ripped of who. Godzilla intervenes & wins.

1831
In Chuck Norrisland civil war breaks out between factions one of whom believes that Chuck Norris was the second coming of Christ, the other side believes him to have been the new Budda.

1832
The USA suddenly appears again!

In the U.S.A. a civil waer begins between people who say America, Amurica, Ameerica, Amorica, and Am'urka.

1833
Watatsuki no Toyohime kicks out the Chinese that was occupying Japan. She then becomes emperor of Japan, re-naming it into Toyotomi Japan. After-wards, she then writes a note to China that if they dare to invade Japan again, she will stuff their government into a small jail, filled with jelly doughnuts, as well as selling most of their land to Nepal, which remained shrouded in mystery.

Meanwhile, Romania declares independence and adopts Dragostea din tei by O-zone (that was brought to them by time machine) as their new anthem. The government of Romania orders it to be played really loud so the whole world can hear it.

Karl Marx appears in Madrid and Hangs himself.

1834
A legion of Ewoks with Roman uniforms appear in Sweden under Emperor Chirpa.

Emperor Cjhirpa finds instructons to make a Dreadnaught (from OTl 1920). He builds 60 of the m and raids Finland, Iceland, and Paris(he put legs on them)O.

The People who say Am'urka win the USA civil war.

1835
Watatsuki no Toyohime purchases the Russian Far East from Russia, and as payment, gives them vodka in return. This made all the Russian people too drunk, as well as making them dance the Kazatsky. Mongolia and Korea all start to laugh at Russia.

Meanwhile, Macau declares independence, and takes most of far Eastern China, from Hainan all the way to Shanghai; as well as renaming it to the 'Empire City of Macau'. To show their power, they build Lamborghinis, McLaren F1s, Pagani Zonda and the Ferraris that they stole from time travelling. The also pass a law that bans all the police departments from chasing cars.

Romania renames their country to O-zone, in honour of the popular song, Dragostea din tei. This causes the real O-zone to move to Europe but is broken a second later due to the song continually playing. Most of North Africa becomes frozen solid.

Emperor Chirpa takes Iceland, Maine, Paris, and Finalnd, and of courese Scandanavia.

1836
The Empire City of Macau decides to build 密卡登 (Translation:Megaton). It is successful, though 密卡登 quickly escapes and invades Greenland, to build a portal and GLaDOS. Cake does not exist any more.

Watatsuki no Toyohime decides to ban Macanese products and she also bans the word 'Macau' in Toyotomi Japan. She also changes the meaning of 'マカオ' to mean '悪' (which means evil). Toyotomi Japan now officially sees Macau as a fictional country, and evil.

Cirno and Letty Whiterock try to fight 密卡登, but 密卡登 turns them into pure water by using the flag of Spain. At the same time, Spain sinks underwater. Portugal celebrates and takes over all of Spains colonies and possessions as well as making them speak Portuguese. Spanish language is no more.

O-Zone (Romania) coins the term 'climate change'. It means "a climate thats nestled between calm Pacific waters and majestic mountains, as well as capturing secrets and treasures of many past civilizations". However, they decide to change the definition of 'climate change' to 'Salut! Sunt eu, un haiduc' (Translation: Hello! I am an outlaw).

1837
Jesus (the real one this time) comes back to life and screams at the Leader of Canada until he blows up. He then calls a cab to take him to Alpha Cenrauri for dinner.

Jesus' brother., Mark comes back to life and follows Jesus.

The Ewoks disvocer drugs. While high they take over Massachusetts.

Eddie the pigs ex-wife becomes a necromancer and moves to Brazil.

A raMPAGE of cows stampede through Texas and Mexico.

1838
Everyone on the Yucatan finds a bottle of Heinakin in thier hjands they all drink it.

A bliond old Chihuahua named Pedro names himself the emperor of Mexico.

Pedro forms an army offiercly loyal Chihauhuas to take over Mexicao in the name of the Chihuiahuan Empire.

A drunk guy in a time machine lands on top of a British ship.

1839
Nothing even remotly interesting happened this year.

1840
Tabloids are invented.

I.B.M. comes back in time and annexes zULULAND.

1841
Watatsuki no Toyohime decides to give Russia more vodka. The leader of Russia drinks the Vodka. All of OTL Russia except the OTL Russian Far East blows up and sinks. The Russian Ocean forms.

Borat appears in OTL Kazakhstan and says "This is all very nice". Borat becomes leader of Kazakhstan and gets huge money in tourist sites thanks to the Russian Ocean.

The Empire City of Macau sells a McLaren F1 to Laos. Laos becomes broken due to the sheer speed of the McLaren.

O-Zone (Romania) plays the Dragostea din tei song even louder. 密卡登 is blown up due to the song's loudness. No one is safe from the Dragostea din tei.

IBM builds radnom towers and invades Gibralter. They win. Now they have Gibralter.

1842
Watatsuki no Toyohime sets the reset button on China. The Song Dynasty re-appears, and starts to sing "もう歌しか聞こえない" (Translation: Deaf to all but the Song). The new anthem fits quite well of Song Dynasty, Toyotomi Japan is entertained.

The Empire City of Macau is annoyed by the Song. Macau builds a shield all over it's lands to prevent any songs from entering in. Music becomes banned in the Empire City of Macau except for Techno and Rock.

Aya Shameimaru, a Russian Vodkaist, accidentally breaks her camera after tripping on her shoe lace. Because of this, huge thunder-storms fall all over North America, and causing great destruction no one has ever seen before.

Romania's tourism increases, due to people trying to command them to stop. Dragostea din tei continues to play and crushes any rebellion from happening in Romania.

The Ottoman Empire starts to turn frozen solid due to having land in al-ready frozen solid North Africa.

The Great Union Of Randomly Picked Countries From Around The Globe And Other Places That Will Dominate Everyone, more commonly known as the GUORPCFATGAOPTWDE, is created from the reminants of the WE FAIL empire on Easter Island. They secure the southern third of the island and ask for a peace treaty with the sqirrels

A banana republic named AAAAAAAAA in the Carribean invents the language of AAAAAAAAAAAAAA. Though practically indecipherable, the one-letter alphabet is a hit in the surrounding area, including sharks, anglerfish, and birds.

1843
The United Nation forms, and it immediatly outlaws the use of the words: the, and, is, was, were, I, and but

Cirno comes back to life and takes over Greenland and becomes a Baker And Kills Apples (BAKA, also known as ⑨ or バカ). Sweden becomes offended because baka in Japanese means idiot, while in the Swedish language it means bake. The Swedes complain to other countries how they ripped off their words.

Watatsuki no Toyohime announces that they will stay out of a "Supranational Organisation", and Toyotomi Japan shuts down their borders to all except for Song China, which is a Japanese Puppet State as well as their main entertainment.

The Empire City of Macau poses a ban on the English Language because it's over-rated (except for Foreign Minister). 與此同時，澳門得到了新的領導人，魂魄妖夢. (Foreign Minister Genghis Khan translates for those who cant read Traditional Chinese: "Meanwhile, Macau gets a new leader, Youmu Konpaku")

Mystia Lorelei, new leader of Song China, proposes plans to rebuild the government buildings to Opera Houses and Music Festivals. It is carried out.

Meanwhile, Turkey (country) declares independence and is no longer frozen solid. A second later, Turkeys (animal) declare war and take over Turkey (country). Turkey (country) adopts 'Gobble' as the official language. The Turkeys also make the Turks speak only gobble. Turkish language is no more, being replaced by some animal noise.

Not only that, Georgia (the country, საქართველო) annexes all other Georgias in the world. Georgia (the country, საქართველო) also controls all of them and make them all speak the Georgian Language (ქართული ენა).

The US breaks up again into soveriegn states. All former states declare war on Massechusetts.

AAAAAAAA AAAAAAAA from the nation of AAAAAAA writes an epic story called AAAAAAA AAA AAAAAA. It spawned the famous quote 'AAA AAAAAA AAAAAAA AA AA AA AAA AA AA'.

1844
Borat adopts a new anthem for Kazakhstan. He then renames Kazakhstan to "The Greatest Country Republic of Kazakhstan."

Watatsuki no Toyohime closes all of Toyotomi Japan's harbours until further notice. However, they still get trades from their Puppet Entertainment State, Song China.

An Ostrich (Austria) becomes Hungry (Hungary), and both eat up Romania. The German and Hungarian version of Dragostea din tei is created. The original, German, and Hungarian version of Dragostea din tei start to play around the world.

Mystia Lorelei blocks all music coming from Europe, saying "it ruins the climate. Think about the climate!!". Song China is saved from the Dragostea din tei. Watatsuki no Toyohime decides to do the same with Toyotomi Japan.

魂魄妖夢決定禁止所有警察局在帝國城澳門. 不久，澳門將成為最安全的地方在世界上. 魂魄妖夢決定改變一個麥克拉倫 F1，不順心的事... ... (Foreign Minister Genghis Khan translates the above: "Youmu Konpaku decides to ban all police stations in the Empire City of Macau. Soon, Macau becomes the safest place in the world. Youmu Konpaku then decides to alter a McLaren F1, something goes wrong...")

1845
邁凱輪 F1的速度和力量的一項進步的時間. 閒來無事今年發生. (Foreign Minister Genghis Khan still translate above!!: "McLaren F1 speeds and forces an advancement in time. Nothing else happen this year.")

1846
邁凱輪 F1 speeds by, nothing happens. Empire City of Macau's laws become defunct due to the sheer speed of the McLaren F1 passing and forcing advancement in time.

1847
McLaren F1 continues to force time advancement. The Empire City of Macau loses some of its buildings.

1848
McLaren F1 passes by this year, Empire City of Macau is tearing apart.

1849
McLaren F1 tears apart and explodes thanks to Youmu Konpaku's altering of the car for making it force the work to go 4 years in advance. The Empire City of Macau collapses and becomes destroyed due to the sheer speed of time and plus it skipped 4 years in time.

Watatsuki no Toyohime becomes ill due to the advancement in time. She will return to power in 1851. Meanwhile, Koishi Komeiji steps into power of Toyotomi Japan as substituting/Acting Emperor. Koishi Komeiji suggests that any one still interested in going back in time to cause havoc in years 1845, 1846, 1847, and 1848 may freely do so and will not affect anything.

Song China annexes all of former Empire City of Macau. Mystia Lorelei poses a ban on McLaren F1s in the country.

Youmu Konpaku goes into exile setting up a government in Korea. Korea then absorbs the exile government and grows stronger.

The fast speed in time did not affect German, Hungarian, and original version of Dragostea din tei in any way. Austria-Hungary-Romania continue to play all of them.

A Flock of Sea-gulls ran so far away and soon Tehran was proclaimed capital of Iran which in turn is the capital of ItRan, which in return is proclaimed the capital of Theyran.

The Chihuahua army under Pedero is given drugs to make them fight harder, it works and they control Mexico within the year. The nexw capitol is Chihuahua and the new national anthem is "All hail Pedro you BASterds.

1850
Koishi Komeiji decides to build the tallest building in the world, it is named "Built Fuji" (Japanese:富士を内蔵). Toyotomi Japan gets a world record for it, however, instead, Koishi Komeiji earns the world record of being "the most scariest person". She took it as a compliment. New Zealand sinks like the Titanic as a result.

Mystia Lorelei passes a law to make police stations legal again. Police Chases are on the rise as new entertainment and action.

Aya Shameimaru buys a new camera. Because of this, later, North America gets hit by Typhoon Vladimir Putin. It was a Category 7 storm and had caused a whole lot of flooding. North America is renamed Dutch Vodka by Aya Shameimaru and her Russian Friends.

The original, German, Hungarian versions of Dragostea din tei becomes a superpower. Austria-Hungary-Romania soon follows this.

1851
Watatsuki no Toyohime becomes Emperor of Toyotomi Japan, and promotes Koishi Komeiji to a Prime Minister. Part of New Zealand returns above water, but turns frozen solid a second later.

Mystia Lorelei bans Grills and Ovens as they are deemed 'overly pure evil'. Micro-waves shrink in size. Song China also exports all their grills and ovens to North Africa.

Typhoon Putin the Vladimir (no relation to the last Typhoon) slams into Chile. Soon, most of Chile becomes frozen solid. Romania and their song shatters into pieces. The world is saved from Dragostea din tei.

Aya Shameimaru purchase the nation of AAAAAAA and renames it to あああああああ！ She then sells the island for free, and is taken over by Boxing Kangaroos from Australia a second later.

The Boxing Kangaroos of AAAAAAAAAA is established.

The quadcycle is invented. It is nicknamed the 'car'.

1852
Watatsuki no Toyohime decides to fund a construction company, Hyundai, to build a Bridge from Kyoto to Middle Earth. Meanwhile, Koishi Komeiji plans invasions to a bunch of islands in the Pacific.

Mystia Lorelei coins the term 'term'. It means "variety of cultures and influenzas come together". Song China makes the definition official.

Aya Shameimaru conquers and takes over the Kodak company. She renames the company to Putin Vodka. Her Russians Friends help her run the business, and it becomes a Casino. Donald Trump summons the Trump (instrument) and accidentally says "Your fried!". All of Turkey (country) is cooked as a result.

The IKEA invasion of Sweden begins.

1st recorded use of weedwackers in warfare. The weedwacker/chainsaw combo, better known as the Chainwacker or the Weedsaw, is invented./

Pedero gets drunlk and INvernt s the electric guitar.

A drunk guy from OTL comes and shoots Eddy the nPigs ex-wife.

1853
Eco-Communism is invented.

The Term "Cooked your goose" is coined" by Eduardo McBatshit who procedes to shooy himself with a revolver (which he just invednted.)

Pen and Paper F.PS.' are invented but are total crap. They mare all ordered burned by God because they are shuch shit. m

Doctor vomitface is born.\

1854
A random voice is heard all over the world saying " You have entered Beef Rib Airspace prepare to be assimilated-- oh crap wrong message, I mean killed.....or was it become deceased from endless sledgehammer pounds, oh well you basterds get the idea. ."

Watatsuki no Toyohime announces the opening of the bridge from Kyoto to Middle Earth. Genghis Khan 2.0 of the Mongol Cyborg-Empire begins the invasion of Middle Earth, and fights the Ducks that are there. All of Toyotomi Japan becomes speechless, not even Koishi Komeiji could say anything except, ロジックはどこにありますか？ (Where is logic?)

Mystia Lorelei bans the cooking of any birds in Song China. She said if one tried to cook a bird. they would get sung to death and use one of the powerful songs that is unimaginable. It would ether be this or this with the last one being the most dangerous ever.

Aya Shameimaru invents a camera that can run on Vodka. However, this makes every picture she takes have contained a Vodka drink.

IKEA took over Sweden and renames themselves as the "Greater IKEA Republic" (Swedish:Större IKEA Republiken, Japanese:グレーターＩＫＥＡ共和国). The Greater IKEA Republic invades Volvo, Saab, Spyker, and builds some Furniture on Wheels.

一千八百五十五 （１８５５）
Watatsuki no Toyohime decided to hijack the year number and turn it into Japanese. Toyotomi Japan celebrates as a result. "Because it needed one, and badly" Watatsuki no Toyohime said. Koishi Komeiji stands by and protects the Emperor and her sayings.

Song China abandons the Simplified Chinese and use only Traditional Chinese because the Simplified was too simple and became defunct for a while. Mystia Lorelei approves of this law and sent into action.

Aya Shameimaru coins the term "Capitalist" and the definition is "Some one who capitalises random letters. Example: LiKe ThIs". Aya Shameimaru also coins the word "Red" and the definition for is this.

The Greater IKEA Republic bans all non-furniture, except food and drinks for very very ovbious reasions.

一千八百五十六 （１８５６）
Watatsuki no Toyohime continues to change the year in Japanese, because it is easier to understand and read; and she also finds and kills the random voice that said weird stuff back in 1854. She also destroys the Beef Rib Airspace thing and renames it into "Outback". Meanwhile, in Toyotomi Japan, people still celebrate and Koishi Komeiji takes over a bunch of islands in the Pacific...and merges them into one large island because there is too many small and tiny islands; less islands the better.

Song China sells the Simplified Chinese Script to Greece. Greece accepts and the Greeks write Greek in Simplified Chinese instead. Bulgaria becomes confused.

Aya Shameimaru becomes CEO and President of the Greater IKEA Republic and says "我々は上昇する！ 我々は戦う！ 我々は我々の敵を征服しなければならない！ 誰も私たちを止められない！" (Translation:We will rise! We will fight! We shall conquer our enemies! No one can stop us!). Aya Shameimaru and her Russian Friends attempts to invade Mexico.

1857
Watatsuki no Toyohime decides to take a break from altering the year into Japanese. However, Toyotomi Japan celebrates the fact that it has scared allot away.

Koishi Komeiji spends some funding into research. India declares independence from the British for a few seconds to reset their banks, then rejoins the UK as a result.

Mystia Lorelei decides to build the Atom Bomb, made completely from Atoms. This fails and as a result, huge mountains grows in the Netherlands and Denmark.

Aya Shameimaru and her Russian Friends continue to invade Mexico, but have a difficult time due to the Sombrero Hats and Taco Bells in the area.

1858
Watatsuki no Toyohime decides to pose a ban on the number 300. Sparta collapses as a result and the Persian Empire takes over Greece.

Greece becomes all Grease and oily and buildings slide all over the place, killing stuff.

Mystia Lorelei decides to send all the Pandas to Mongolia. Pandas take over Mongolia in a day and invade the Bear's (Russia) waters. Soon, Russia is above land.

Kazakhstan loses money in tourism thanks to the Russian Ocean dispersing. Borat Sagdiyev steps down and Kazakhstan becomes nothing more than a deserted wasteland.

Aya Shameimaru decides to leave Mexico alone after her Russian Friends all got killed. Aya Shameimaru decides to invade Norway and invade the seas, while wearing a Viking hat with horns and carrying a Camera-sword.

1859
Watatsuki no Toyohime decides to buy a Vase and throws it at Russia. St. Peters-burg shatters like glass and breaks apart and collapses. Alexander II also is broken like glass. Alexander III becomes new leader of Russia.

Mystia Lorelei sings. That is all that is happening in Song China. Nothing else. Except that Song China builds Singing Harbour Ports. That is all.

Aya Shameimaru conquers Norway, Feta Cheese (Greece), A Flock of Sea-gulls, Typhoon, and accidentally spills Kool-aid into the Red Sea, turning it red. Aya Shameimaru is put down as a member of the Axis of Evil.

Deer Reader Kim Il Sung successfully reads another book. He is proclaimed emperor of some Library in Fiji.

1860
Watatsuki no Toyohime creates an ice machine, and freezes the Pacific Ocean. Water levels drop significantly around the world, by -200 metres. The UK and Ireland is eaten up by Europe, Australia eats up part of Indonesia and etc. Basically, more land is made. It is now possible to slide from Japan to Colombia. Hawaii doesn't exist any more.

Song China bans fire-places and heaters. Then again, every one is used to the cold in Song China so it really doesn't matter.

The Greater IKEA Republic begins invasion of Antarctica. They take over the continent in 1 day and builds an IKEA in the centre of the South Pole and the flag of IKEA is raised. A Cold War begins between Aya Shameimaru's IKEA Republic and Iceland.

The Danish declares war and defeats Cirno. Frederick VII says "Grønland vil altid tilhøre os danske! Ikke Cirno! Ikke Rusland! Ikke Canada eller britiske! Ikke Serbien! Ikke nogle middelklasse person! Grønland vil altid tilhøre Danmark for evigt! Prøv at tage det væk, og du vil betale konsekvenserne!" (Greenland will always belong to us Danish! Not Cirno! Not Russia! Not Canada or the British! Not Serbia! Not some Middle Class Person! Greenland will always belong to Denmark forever! Try to take it away and you will pay the consequences!)

Deer Reader Kim Il Sung reads an instrument book. The Fiji Library now becomes a part Library, and part Music Room.

1861
Watatsuki no Toyohime decides to use the ice machine on Desert areas. They are quickly turned into Rain-forests.

Mystia Lorelei bans the word 'fire' in Song China. Which is not a problem, as the word was quickly fallen out of use.

The Reykjavík Missile Crisis happens. Aya Shameimaru proposes to the IKEA Government that sanctions should be posed on Iceland. They do so, with out causing a war.

The Computist Rates of Armenia declares independence from Russia. The Greater IKEA Republic decides to invade Armenia, defeats it, and Armenia rejoins Russia.

1862
Watatsuki no Toyohime builds shrines, and the Greeks are returned to ancient history.

Song China host the Opera Olympics. It is quickly won by the Lamborghini Gallado.

Aya Shameimaru builds camera-coats. This angers Iceland and the Cold War is starting to cool down.

Jared Fogle goes back in time to build a Subway. It will offer rides from Burger King to the metropolitan heart of down-town, Toronto.

1863
Watatsuki no Toyohime invents the Flood-resistant mirror-drilling machine (Japanese:洪水トレラントミラーのドリル; Hungarian:Árvíztűrő tükörfúrógép). This causes the floods in Indonesia to be delayed from the air-ports.

Mystia Lorelei decides to host an Opera Olympics every 4 years. A ghostly feeling is felt through-out Song China.

The Icelandic President, Friðrik ⑨ is shot in Australia. Iceland declares war, and elects Cirno II as the new President of Iceland.

Aya Shameimaru secretly puts sanctions against the バカ president of Iceland. Iceland hosts a バカ feast.

1864
Watatsuki no Toyohime uses the ice machine again. Dark clouds start to cover up 99% of the Earth. Plants become more green and trees grow more. Toyotomi Japan celebrates the clouds.

Mystia Lorelei decides to build another Great Wall of China, but this time, made completely out of notes and music.

Aya Shameimaru builds a nuclear camera. It works. Meanwhile, the Greater IKEA Republic invades Ukraine because it needed Chernobyl as a test site.

Another Typhoon slams into Australia. The desert is turned into a swamp.

1865
Watatsuki no Toyohime decides to clone the Big Ben and reformat the clock to look like a mix between the Big Ben and the Shinto Shrine. Toyotomi Japan celebrates, and the United Kingdom is lost in time.

Song China creates sanctions against Kyrgyzstan for having a weird name.

The Greater IKEA Republic bans the following words: For not so obvious reasons. Meanwhile, Aya Shameimaru builds a camera-powered chair.
 * Muscovy
 * France
 * United Kingdom
 * Hammer
 * Latin

1866
Watatsuki no Toyohime finally announces the opening and completion of the bridge from Kyoto to Middle-Earth. Soon, Utsuho Reiuji arrives from Middle-Earth and drops a Nuclear Sun on the Aztec Empire. The Chihauhuas, Pedro, Mexico and all else is destroyed. The Usa also explodes.

Mystia Lorelei has a celebration all over Song China. They also force the British Empire (Song China's puppet state) to take over the destroyed wasteland. Because of this, petroleum is made free forever.

Ironically, the Earth gets 20 degrees Celsius colder. The Sun itself shrinks a bit.

The Greater IKEA Republic steals some nuclear atoms. Meanwhile, Aya Shameimaru invents a Nuclear Camera.

1867
Watatsuki no Toyohime purchases the Dutch East Indies. Toyotomi Japan starts to burn down all the plants in the former colony in case there was any source of drugs lying around.

Mystia Lorelei plans to build a Musical Restaurant. Meanwhile, Shanghai becomes the new capital for a brief moment.

Aya Shameimaru starts to build radio-active furniture. The Greater IKEA Republic is now a Nuclear Power. Another Cold War starts between Aya's Greater IKEA Republic and Utsuho Reiuji, and IKEA is also stuck in a Cold War with Iceland.

The Netherlands are taken over by Hamsters and Amsterdamn is renamed Hamsterdam.

1868
Watatsuki no Toyohime uses the ice machine again to cool down the Earth more. It works, and the small possible heat wave is frozen up. This goes to grills as well.

Song China celebrates the fact that colder planet is better then Global Warning. Mystia Lorelei sings happily.

Aya Shameimaru invents a new flavour of Vodka - Nuclear Vodka. This new flavour will have the taste of a radioactive smelly magnet and a possible explosion can happen if the person walks on carpets or stuck in a thunder-storm.

The Greater IKEA Republic, Iceland, and Utsuho Reiuji are now stuck in a Cold War with each other. And Aya's recent invention has angered both Iceland and Utsuho. Iceland is more or less angry about the copy-right of Vodka.

Meanwhile, Italy is unified and many pizzas are made in celebration. They also build the world's largest Pizza palace in a government building.

Chuck Norris pimp-slaps the Earth,so it blew up.

'''That is not make any sense. Also ruins everything. So, no, sorry.'''

1869
Watatsuki no Toyohime decides to annex Song China to be part of Toyotomi Japan. It happens, and the music is saved from being stolen from Song China. Mystia Lorelei still builds more Theatres for singing, however.

The Greater IKEA Republic builds more radioactive furniture. Iceland builds a Nuclear Ice-cube. Utsuho Reiuji is nuclear. The Cold War escalates to no where. The government of Venezuela tries to intervene but gets blown up at the last minute.

Aya Shameimaru's Nuclear Vodka sells not so high in Russia due to reported stuff that people are turned into dragons, wood, cloud, and even as far as a tornado. However, the Nuclear Vodka remains popular.

1870
Watatsuki no Toyohime builds a tornado. The tornado becomes a superpower and sucks up Indonesia. It removes all stains from it, even red wine.

Mystia Lorelei sings again. The tornado drops Indonesia back where it belongs. The tornado then strikes into Australia and declares war on trees.

Aya Shameimaru invents Zorbeez (which smells like a magnet). It can be used to clean up stains, even radioactive material. Iceland and Utsuho Reiuji try to invent something to counter it, but nothing happens. The Greater IKEA Republic is on the side of winning, maybe.

1871
Toyotomi Japan absorbs Mongolia into its empire, and turns it into an arctic tundra, as well as a grass-land. Fire and sand storms become banned in Mongolia. Watatsuki no Toyohime passes a law that strictly enforces the rule of no fire.

The Greater IKEA Republic builds the worlds largest IKEA store. However, under the store, contains stuff. Iceland and Utsuho Reiuji try and push sanctions against it, but they accidentally pushed sanctions against each other.

The Tree War in Australia is over, with a crushing victory from a tornado. Australia is once again, a desert. That is, until Typhoon mysteriously comes knocking on its door.

1872
Toyotomi Japan decides to build a house on the mountain, in the province of Song China. The house holds, until it causes the Eyjafjallajökull volcano in Iceland to erupt. Watatsuki no Toyohime has nothing to say about this strange happening.

Iceland gets knocked out due to the Eyjafjallajökull eruption and can't participate in the Cold War for a while. The Greater IKEA Republic builds a mix between a chair and a table and repels away any volcanic smoke away from them.

Australia is hit by flooding, mostly seen in the centre of where mostly desert would be. Australia starts to sink into the ocean because of this.

18@#
Godzilla wakes up and in a fit of rage destroyes Chuck Norris and his country and brings back the world to its original state and then he leaves to marry Mothra.

The number @# (37 backwards) is outlawd.

Српска мафија уништава енглески језик у пљачку банке. Енглески говорници су приморани да говоре српски уместо. (Translation, highlight to read:) (The Serbian Mafia destroys the English language in a bank robbery. English speakers are forced to speak Serbian instead.)

1874
Det Större IKEA Republiken återställer det engelska språket. Aya Shameimaru then kidnaps all of Serbia and annex it to the Greater IKEA Republic. Foreign Minister Louis Gerhard De Geer says that återställer = restores. And also adds to figure out the rest of the Swedish sentence as it is blatantly obvious of what it should supposed to say.

Prime Minister Koishi Komeiji says that money is the main cause of problems, troubles, and tornadoes. Toyotomi Japan and Watatsuki no Toyohime says nothing on the issue. Money becomes listed on the Axis of Greed, term coined by some random person from New Zealand.

The Falkland Islands are invaded by Sheep. Deer Reader Sheep Sung Il takes control of the newly formed "Falkland Sheep's Republic"

Typhoon Vladimir the Putin MKII strikes back. It makes waterfall in Hamsterdam. A war between the Hamster Netherlands, Falkland Sheep's Republic, and Vodka Russia begins.

1875
Watatsuki no Toyohime builds a proton-rocket-grenade-missile launcher that can destroy things within a 500km radius times 3.14. It is tested in the Pacific. The small islands out scattered in the Pacific are blown to shreds by the explosion and Hawaii breaks like glass. Toyotomi Japan celebrates the excitement.

The Greater IKEA Republic builds their first ballistic table missile as a temporary replacement for Nuclear Power Plants. Aya Shameimaru builds a Vodklear Power Plant (Power Plant powered by Vodka), Moscow is renamed Vodskaw because of it.

On a Cold Winter Mourning, Korea is in silence. 1st ever silence ever since the Mongol Empire.

Libya declares war on Chad, Chad declares war on Darwin, Darwin declares war on Libya. All three lose to Otto von Bismarck.

1876
Watatsuki no Toyohime unites small villages and towns into one large city in Toyotomi Japan. It is successful. Meanwhile, London becomes Balkanised.

The Greater IKEA Republic declares war, and invades on Iceland and annexes it thanks to the Volcanic Advantage Company and Chinese Restaurants support. Now the Cold War is between Greater IKEA Republic and Utsuho Reiuji. Aya Shameimaru invents the Table-Chair-Couch-Engine-Nuclear-Missile Launcher, which can shoot furniture at 300+ kilometres an hour and leaves stains on the kitchen floor., and Anti-Flammable!

The Caribbean Islands become balkanised. The people who live on these islands are also balkanised, as well as domestic house pets.

1877
In Toyotomi Japan, Watatsuki no Toyohime merges more small villages and towns into very huge cities, and builds more buildings in between. Meanwhile, England Cities becomes Balkanised. Koishi Komeiji passes a law that protects Toyotomi Japan from being balkanised, and becomes immune.

The Greater IKEA Republic also passes an anti-balkanisation law that will protect the Greater IKEA Republic from any harm. The law itself is also immune to balkanisation. Meanwhile, a Thunderstorm hits St. Petersburg, and the rivers are flooded with Vodka. Soon all of St. Petersburg is flooded with Vodka and Russians celebrate.

Aya Shameimaru uses Table-Chair-Couch-Engine-Nuclear-Missile Launcher against a lake filled with dolphins and sharks. They become balkanised after the weapon was fired at them.

Chile gets hit by a balkanised Earthquake. Chile had no damage and stayed intact.

1878
Toyotomi Japan becomes over-modernised, which is a good thing. Watatsuki no Toyohime renews her contract which keeps her in power for another 45 years. The Japanese celebrate.

The Greater IKEA Republic attempts to modernise Russia, but instead, Vodkaises them more. Meanwhile, an IKEA sales-person discovers that the Ancient Geeks from Ancient Greece invented the modem laptop. Aya Shameimaru takes note of this and hosts it on the in Sunflower Britain.

A bloody snow-storm strikes New Zealand. No buildings, only survivors. No deaths were caused by cold, only heat.

1879
Toyotomi Japan builds a shield to keep any typhoons out. The next typhoon is reflected off and hits Canada. Mountains start to grow in Canada due to 9 out of 10 scientists agreeing.

The Greater IKEA Republic declares war against the Forest Republic and wins. The Gorillas use guerilla warfare tactics to take back the forest, but fail. Aya Shameimaru kills 3 birds with no stones as a result, no money back.

The Caribbean islands themselves become balkanised.

1880
Toyotomi Japan takes control of the local news-paper faculty for a while to send a fax.

The Greater IKEA Republic makes 20 more years to win the Cold War. They begin building Table-Aeroplane B17 Bombers and Lounge Chair Tanks. Aya Shameimaru gets a new Russian name, Nadezhda Zhukov and Aye is her new nickname.

Russia establishes an Official Holiday, called Vodka Month, and it will be on all the days on the 11th Month. All stores are closed throughout the 11th month from now on, except places to buy and drink Vodka.

1881
Toyotomi Japan now has -3% unemployment. Watatsuki no Toyohime decides to create the negative version percent, and the less the percent, better it is.

The Greater IKEA Republic announces a new sale. Everything is 20% more or less, depends on their mood. Nadezhda Zhukov invents and introduces the Big City Slider Station. It can cut and clean food for only 19.99£ only for a limited time.

The Swiss Cheese is made in Switzerland. Soon, they discover large pipes that go to China, through Earth of course.

1882
Toyotomi Japan re-formats the light bulb and adjusts the price tag down to 3.14 yen. Street lights are beginning to be thief-proof. The thief would take 100 years just to steal a street light.

The Greater IKEA Republic begins invasion of Africa. Because most of the continent is frozen solid, they take most of it. They begin to build IKEA stores out of pure ice and make furniture out of pure ice. Nadezhda Zhukov builds an ice camera, and tests it, and it works.

The island of Cuba begins to be balkanised.

1883
Toyotomi Japan opens up a racing circuit in the power system of an engine. It is successful.

Greater IKEA Republic annexes a rock or 2 to help build its strength. Nadezhda Zhukov builds an Ice Ice AK-47 that can shoot Ice Bullets at 400+ kph and get a head-shot in less then 9 minutes.

Duck Hunt begins in Panama. Gangsters with 9MM Postal Mail-boxes joins the Duck Hunt competition.

1884
Toyotomi Japan begins building a Tornado Twister Information Technology Institute of Modems. Some become confused by it.

Greater IKEA Republic establishes a KGB. Nadezhda Zhukov tells that it has nothing to do with Companyunism or Solummunism.

The Mañana is made in Panama. It's slogan is "You'll get there yesterday"

1885
Toyotomi Japan establishes a road way in the mountain country side of the coastal bay. The roads make it tough to attack at high speeds, and causes a tornado to form in Vietnam.

Greater IKEA Republic opens up a KGB food place that sells fried chicken. Nadezhda Zhukov investigates any possible modifications to cancel a check of a chess board.

The Mañana reaches a world speed record of 999 kph, and is the fastest car of all time.