The Corporate States of America

It was certainly a close call. George Bush II had declared two wars on the Axis of Evil and supposed terrorist nations. He was spoiling a French alliance. He was giving already corrupt companies special powers. And nobody thought anything of it, until Michael Moore famously said "We live in fictitious times with a fictitious president waging a fictitious war." Michael Moore let the citizens of America know what was happening and saved us from a horrifying future. But years earlier, he narrowly escaped an encounter with a drunken driver with only a bad arm. But what if the driver had moved only a few inches closer to Moore and struck him fatally? With Michael Moore dead, the world would be a terrible place. Relations with France were already deteriorating as the president of France led an alliance to properly free Iraq and warn the world that America was not what it was before. George II realized that if France freed Iraq and spread the word on his betrayal, the citizens would find the truth and his plans would be ruined. So he faked evidence that France was funding Saddam Hussein and that five members of Al Quaeda, including bin Laden, were hiding in Paris enjoying lavish French hospitality. When Saddam Hussein sent an air raid and attacked the new American warship U.S.S. Ronald Reagan, Bush claimed the bombs they dropped were French. So on January 3rd, 2004, at dawn, four Marines planted a bomb inside the Eiffel Tower, cleared out and, two minutes later, clicked a button that sparked the Third World War and made Bush one of the most powerful people on Earth. The national landmark of France was swallowed in flames, and when the smoke cleared one of the four legs were gone. Slowly but surely, the tower leaned over and collapsed into the Seine.