User:Nathan1123/A Crimmass Carol - Chapter 4

Crim sat speechless, as a thick cloud of silence sat between him and the screen. Discord, as well as the whole of Crim’s computer, was completely devoid of human life, or any life at all. The exception was from one user, although somehow he felt more alone with it than without it. The reader will permit me using the term ‘user’, which implies a sort of humanity of which this visitor had none. A feeling of sheer lifelessness emanated from its posts, not like a bot or an inactive user, but more like a hanging carcass built from 1s and 0s. Its avatar at first appeared completely black, except closer inspection revealed the faint reflection of a human skull, the kind of horrific image usually only found on the Dark Web (the Dark Web is the deepest bowl of the Internet, where the foulest things are safely locked away from decent human beings). This ghostly harbinger was the last thing Crim ever wanted to see.

And it was typing.

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CrimsonAssassin: “So I take it you must be the ghost of Christmas future? Or something like that?”

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CrimsonAssassin: “So…. You are going to show me shadows of things that have *not* happened, but will happen, sometime in the future?”

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CrimsonAssassin: “I must admit, I…. I’m more afraid of you than any other ghost I’ve seen tonight.”

CrimsonAssassin: “But I assume whatever you want, it’s for the best. I will bear with whatever you want to show me, and I’ll do it gladly.”

CrimsonAssassin: “… if I live long enough.”

CrimsonAssassin: “Are you…. Just never going to speak?”

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CrimsonAssassin: “Fine, have it your way. Lead on, I assume our time is limited.”

Crim instinctively clicked on the Spirit’s avatar, and the Discord shifted. To Crim’s surprise, the Discord looked much brighter, more seamless and professional, and a plethora of features that he did not understand. Fancying this as the future of the app, Crim’s heart momentarily lightened, hoping to see the prosperous legacies let by himself and his peers: MP, Sky, Edge and Andy, who he had left in such high spirits in the present day. Instead, when Crim looked up he audibly gaped in horror, and his heart sank deeper in his chest than it was before. There, before his eyes was Discord and the wiki administrated by the admins of the Subreddit: the Cronies.

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CrimsonAssassin: “Please, you don’t need to remind me.”

Tr0llis: “No, I don’t know anything else about it. Either way, all I know is he’s dead.”

Ratcolor: “When??”

Tr0llis: “Last night, as far as I know.”

Fritzmet: “But how did it happen? I thought that cold coot would never die.”

Tr0llis: “Search me.”

Harvenard: “What happened to all of his timelines?

Tr0llis: “I haven’t heard. Left it to the other mods, maybe. He didn’t leave any of it to *me*, that’s all I know.”

Fritzmet: “lol”

Tr0llis: “It will probably be a small memoriam, although I can’t imagine anyone would want to attend.”

Tr0llis: “Why don’t we make a celebration out of it?”

Harvenard: “I won’t mind going if there’s free food.”

Fritzmet: “LOL”

Tr0llis: “Well, I probably care the least out of all of us, since a) I rarely attend memorial services anyway, and b) I don’t usually eat lunch, but if anyone else is going, then I wouldn’t mind tagging along.”

Tr0llis: “Come to think of it, I could hazard a guess I was his closest friend.”

Tr0llis: “Anyway, gtg.”

CrimsonAssassin: “Wait… what’s going on? What’s the meaning of this?”

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The Cronies, having other matters to attend to, went their separate ways. Some other users then entered the chat, both bearing the marks of admins.

FirestormBlizzard: “How are you?”

NonsensicalJourney: “Fairly well, how about you?”

FirestormBlizzard: “Not bad! Old Crumbs finally kicked the bucket, eh?”

NonsensicalJourney: “So I’ve heard. Completely cold right?”

FirestormBlizzard: “Apropos for Christmas.”

FirestormBlizzard: “Do you do any League?”

NonsensicalJourney: “Hehe, perhaps some other time. Cya.”

CrimsonAssassin: “What is up with these random conversations? Is there some hidden meaning I’m missing?”

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CrimsonAssassin: “Oh, no need for an overly-elaborate explanation. The abridged version will do.”

Crim was anxiously looking about as he said this, hoping to catch some hide or hair of his future doppleganger. But he could not find any familiar sign, not even an inactive account, to verify his future existence. The Spirit led Crim out of that place, and linked him to the chat on the Subreddit. The Subreddit of the wiki was never officially recognized. It was created by the Cronies, an to this day is populated by the most vile and odious trolls that ever plagued althistory. Their crimes collectively was a sour plum pudding, based in satire with a filling of outright bullying and blackmail, sprinkled with sockpuppeting and a dash of manipulation.

Crim saw the top post was created by Ms himself, simply titled “the Great Auction.” The post was a link to a long list, including an assortment of articles, blogs, timelines, images, audio files, applications, and a host of other more minor objects. Ms sat amongst these items and those commenting on the post, serenely answering questions about the inventory. Some of the other Cronies, being admins of the Subreddit, were still adding more stuff to this list, for rhymes or reasons known to everyone by Crim. At one point, they were so anxious in their diligence that they began to edit-conflict.

MsCoree: “Lol, be careful there. Let Tr0llis get in first, then Fritzmet can go, and then the others.”

RatC: “Ms, you couldn’t have picked a better time! This close to Christmas, all the best people are out from school for the holidays. Come one, come all, to the final Auction! Tonight, everyone’s a winner!”

Tr0llis: “Honestly, what are the chances of that happening? Everyone has the right to take care of themselves first. I mean, *he* always did.”

MsCoree: “That’s an understatement. *No one* ever did as much as he.”

RatC: “Well then, what are we waiting for? We aren’t taking each other’s numbers are we?”

Tr0llis: “Of course not.”

MsCoree: “We should hope not ;)”

Tr0llis: “At any rate, who would honestly miss these trifling works? Not a dead man, I assume.”

MsCoree: “lol certainly not.”

Tr0llis: “If he wanted to keep them after death, the old crumb, then why didn’t he have more apprentices on the wiki? If he had, he would have had somebody notified when he was struck with Death, instead of lying gasping out his last breath, all alone.”

MsCoree: “Very wise words, Trollis. He has certainly condemned himself.”

Tr0llis: “I wish the condemnation was worse. And it would have been, if we could get our hands on anything more. But anyway, show them the haul, Ratc.”

RatC: “As you can see on my Google Drive, I managed to pilfer his various files, including some CoA, flags, and even maps. Snatched a few anthems in audio files as well for good measure.”

MsCoree: “Oh come on, don’t make me laugh. Those trinkets aren’t even worth the applications they’re made on. Next!”

Fritzmet: “Well, I at least did the sensible thing of raiding his timelines and blogs. A lot of these got Stirling's, you know, and not without good reason.”

MsCoree: “I give you some brownie points for taking the bolder move. The wiki’s mods tend to have sticky fingers when it comes to the intellectual property of the deceased. But other than that, I can’t give much more than RatC. Next!”

Tr0llis: “Finally! Now take a look at *my* Google drive.”

MsCoree: “What, what is this? A journal of some sort?”

Tr0llis: “Of a kind… his personal timeline notes.”

MsCoree: “Personal… notes? Are you telling me you took them straight off of his computer?”

Tr0llis: “Indeed I did. Why not?”

MsCoree: “Tr0llis, you were born to make a fortune! And you definitely will.”

Tr0llis: “I certainly won’t let my hand return empty whenever I reach out with it. And that was the kind of man he was, I can tell you that, Ms. Just be careful of the ISO images.”

MsCoree: “ISO images? From his OS??”

Tr0llis: “Where else do you think? It’s not like his computer’s going to need them anymore, I’d reckon.”

MsCoree: “I just hope for our sake he didn’t leave any viruses in there.”

Tr0llis: “Bah, don’t worry about that, I wouldn’t have been lingering on his back-end so long if I thought he did that sort of thing.”

Tr0llis: “Oh, and his Facebook especially is in perfect condition. You won’t find a single hole of information there, as long as you use the encryption codes I included. They would have been wasted if I hadn’t acted fast.”

MsCoree: “What would you consider them being ‘wasted’?”

Tr0llis: “Closing it down, ofc. Somebody, probably a family member was a fool enough to close it already, but I manged to recover it. It’s all for the best, anyway, his family pictures don’t look any uglier than he did.”

Crim read through this Reddit thread in abject horror. These trolls, these monsters had paraded about their spoil, with as much disgust as if they were demons marketing the corpse itself. Finally, when all the treasures were given inventory, each member of the Subreddit was given his dues in the form of Western Union orders from Ms. These portions of money were all proportional to the loot they invested, with Tr0llis taking the lion’s share.

Tr0llis: “LOLOL, so this is how it all ends. He scared away everyone while he was alive, only to profit *us* with his death! LMAO”

CrimsonAssassin: “SPIRIT!! I swear to God, I hope that isn’t me they are talking about. What the frick is going on here??”

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The Spirit directed Crim’s attention to the main link of the post: it was a link back to the wiki, specifically a user’s account. Crim’s cursor steadily glided over the blue lettering, where the slightest flick of his finger would open the web page and disclose the identity of this figure. He thought of it, and felt how easy it would be to do, and longed to do it; but had no more power to enter the link than he had to dismiss the specter at his side. An almost pale light arose from the link he rolled over, ominous of an Internet persona plundered and bereft, unwatched, unwept, and uncared for.

Oh, the cold, cold, rigid, dreadful Death, having set up your alter here, and decorate it with such terrors as you have at your command: for this is your dominion! But on the head of one who is loved, revered, and honored, you cannot turn one hair to a dreadful purpose, or make any feature odious. It is not that the hand will fall on its own; it is not that the heart is still alive; but that the hand *was* open, generous, and true; the heart brave, warm, and tender; as was his heart. Strike, shadow, strike! And see his good deeds springing from the wound, to sow the world with life immortal!

Somehow, Crim could hear this last monologue echoing in his head, even though there was no voice or words on the screen. Still, he could not bring himself to open that page, in spite of the insistence of the Spirit:

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CrimsonAssassin: “Spirit… this is a terrible place. When we leave, I swear I will not forget this lesson. Just please let me go!”

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CrimsonAssassin: “I know exactly what you mean, believe me I do. If I could, I would definitely do it, but… I just can’t! I can’t bring myself to do it!”

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CrimsonAssassin: “If there is one person, just one person *anywhere* on this whole website that has a feeling about this death, please show it to me, I beg you.”

The ghost relented, and the screen shifted back to Discord. This time it was a private server, humble and not customized, in similar vein to Josh’s server in the present day. One user was present, a meek and feeble woman, who had been blocked from the wiki a long time ago. She anxiously awaited the arrival of her companion, who she expected would bring some final, good news.

At last, a new user appeared, also being another banned user. For a while, there was just silence in the air, until at last she put out her faint question:

Gatthias: “Is it good…. Or bad?”

Hquvfrioyle Lilenofryn: “Bad.”

Gatthias: “So we are doomed?”

Hquvfrioyle Lilenofryn: “No. There is still hope.”

Gatthias: “Only if he relents.”

Gatthias: “Yes, nothing is past hope, if a miracle has happened.”

Hquvfrioyle Lilenofryn: “He won’t relent at this point. He’s dead.”

Gatthias: “Oh, I… I didn’t realize. I’m sorry.”

Hquvfrioyle Lilenofryn: “What the mods were telling me, when I was trying to present my case to them, and I thought it was just an excuse to not hear me, turned out to be completely true. He’s gone.”

Gatthias: “So who will hear our case now?”

Hquvfrioyle Lilenofryn: “I don’t know, but no doubt it will be someone more merciful than him.”

Hquvfrioyle Lilenofryn: “I gtg Gatthias, but at least we can sleep easy tonight”

And so it was, that the only emotion felt for this sudden death was that of happiness.

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CrimsonAssassin: “Ugh, fine then, show me someone who feels *sympathy* for this death, someone who feels some kind of regret. I swear after that I will see the memoriam you linked.”

The spirit relented again, and conducted Crim to the server of JoshTheRoman, which he had been to previously. The same motley crew was there, carefully conducted by Candiesrgood. People were still working on their timeline projects as before, but this time they were all deadly solemn. Aside from the occasional testing of connection and half-hearted reply, the chat looked like a grave of users.

Adolf Coffee: “`He took a child, and set him in the midst of them.`”

Candiesrgood: “Gah! My eyes are starting to hurt”

Adolf Coffee: “The color?”

Candiesrgood: “They’re better now.”

Candiesrgood: “They get weak by the back-light of the computer. I don’t want to look weak to Josh when he comes back, which should be any minute now.”

SolaceEaSw: “It’s getting late already.”

SolaceEaSw: “I think he’s been getting slower than usual, especially these last few nights.”

Candiesrgood: “I know when he would be on the wiki with Tiny Vinny, he was always happy to finish early.”

SolaceEaSw: “Yeah, that was always the case.”

Adolf Coffee: “Indeed.”

Candiesrgood: “Vinny was always eager to help out, and Josh never had any trouble finding him work to do, never.”

The thick silence between posts was finally cut through by Josh entering the chat, solemn as his guests, but being much more open to convesation.

Candiesrgood: “Ah, there he is now.”

Adolf Coffee: “It’s going to be ok, Josh, don’t worry.”

JoshTheRoman: “A great work you have going on here as usual, guys. At this rate, you’ll be done before Sunday.”

Candiesrgood: “Sunday? So you went to work on the memoriam today?”

JoshTheRoman: “Yes, Candy. I wish everyone could have pitched in. You should see how lovely and green the page is already. But you’ll get to see it often. I promised I would finish it on a Sunday.”

JoshTheRoman: “Oh, my little, little user!”

Adolf Coffee: “We’re all here for you, Josh” (followed by a hugging emote)

JoshTheRoman: “Thank you, everyone” (a warm smile)

JoshTheRoman: “When I was getting ready to leave, I happened to come across MP.”

JoshTheRoman: “He asked me what was wrong, and I just said ‘just a little down you know’”

JoshTheRoman: “And then he responded in the kindest way I could imagine ‘I am heartily sorry for your loss, Josh, and heartily sorry for that good user Candy’s too.’ How he even knew about it, idk.”

Candiesrgood: “Knew what?”

JoshTheRoman: “That you were a good user” (winking face)

SolaceEaSw: “Phah, everyone knows that already.”

JoshTheRoman: “Very true, at least I hope they do.”

JoshTheRoman: “He went on to say ‘heartily sorry for that good user Candy. If I can be of help to you in any way, here is my number.’”

JoshTheRoman: “I really felt… a sense of hope, you know? It was as if he had really known our Tiny Vinny, and felt him with us.”

Candiesrgood: “MP has such a kind soul.”

JoshTheRoman: “You really should have been there to hear what he said, it was indeed very kind. I wouldn’t be surprised if it lifted Solace’s spirits.”

Candiesrgood: “How nice.”

Lord Falcon1221: “Someday Solace will be running the wiki himself, and there won’t be any of those problems.”

SolaceEaSw: “Lol”

JoshTheRoman: “Tbh it doesn’t really matter one way or another. Idk, there’s a lot of time for that.”

JoshTheRoman: “However or whatever we are in the future, I am sure about one thing, that we will never forget poor Tiny Vinny, or any of the first time we met him.”

Adolf Coffee: “Never!”

JoshTheRoman: “I am very happy to hear that.”

They all commiserated as warmly and as closely as the digital world would permit them. Spirit of Tiny Vinny, your childish essence was from God!

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CrimsonAssassin: “Spirit… somehow, some way, I feel like our time together is coming to a close. Will you tell me whose user account those Cronies were talking about?”

At this point, all the rest of Discord melted away, and Crim was left staring at the same, silent screen he started this last session with. His heart was pounding in rhythm to the computer clock, which by now was racing uncontrollably into the future. For a moment, Crim decided to attempt to find out what happens to himself in the future, at the very least to see if he is finally happy in the end. But as he attempted to open up his emails, Facebook, Snapchat, even his Imgur account, all it returned with was `no account found`. Not a single trace of himself could he find anywhere in the vast infinite realm of the Internet. At last, he returned to Discord, and discovered the ghost had left a single message that made his skin turn pale:

011000010110: Do you really want to know?

CrimsonAssassin: “Oh God… well, can we discuss this? The future isn’t static, right? I mean, that’s what we’re all about – Alternate History! Isn’t that how it works?”

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CrimsonAssassin: “Before I click, just one more question: are these the shadows of things that will be, or are they shadows of things that *may* be only?”

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CrimsonAssassin: “Certain factors in history can make certain outcomes inevitable, but – but! If those factors are changed, the outcome can also be altered after that point of divergence.”

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CrimsonAssassin: “Please! Just say something to tell me this is true!”

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With an trepidation mapped out by the goosebumps on his limbs, Crim opened the link, and was confronted by that all-too-familiar signature:

CrimsonAssassin.

CrimsonAssassin: “Was *I* the one those people were talking about?”

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CrimsonAssassin: “No! Oh, God, please, No!”

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CrimsonAssassin: “Spirit, wait! Listen for a moment! I am not the man I was. I will not be the man I must have been if not for this intervention.”

CrimsonAssassin: “Why would you show this to me if I was past hope?”

011000010110: “...”

As before, Crim was losing his balance, but this time he gave a swift kick to his chair and went down on his knees before the computer:

CrimsonAssassin: “Spirit, I can feel you have some pity for me. Just tell me that I still have the power to change these shadows you showed me, and change my life!”

011000010110: “...”

CrimsonAssassin: “I will honor Christmas in my heart, and try to keep it all year long. I will live in the past, the present, and the future. The spirits of all three will strive within me. I will not shut out the lessons they taught. Oh, tell me I can make this link go away!”

Crim started to scream, and as he did he clutched each side of the computer screen with such force as to almost break them off. His face planted on the keyboard, eyes swollen red from weeping. As soon as his eyes closed shut, he could almost feel a ray of morning light gently caress the back of his neck.